"Why did I start blogging?" it's something I ask myself when I'm stressed out and don't have enough time to dedicate to 'me' activities like blogging. The situation I am in (usually) when I voice the question is precisely why. I wanted to know that I'm not alone in struggling to reach my goals (on my tough days) and to share my triumphs on my good days. So with that little preamble here's my first ever post on this blog:
I'm The Working Mummy
Writing has always been my chosen form of self-expression. Up until I became a mom, writing in my diary was satisfying enough. But when I entered this new phase of life, I realized that I wanted to connect with other people who were going through the same stuff. And that's what I hope to do through this blog, make a whole bunch of new friends who can guide me or at the minimum commensurate and celebrate with me.
Being a mummmy is by far the toughest thing I have ever had to do. I have a gorgeous and sweet-tempered baby, however I absolutely hated the first year of being a mom (more about that in another entry). I don't think my daughter is to blame for this, it's totally because of the kind of person I am:
- I love spending time on my own - reading, painting (you don't get much of this when you have a baby or toddler attached to you). Even after I got married, if my husband was busy I would happily take off to go have lunch at a coffee shop with just my book for company.
- I have to 'do' something fun or exciting everyday, or at least every weekend. I can't stand having one day be exactly like the next.
- I love working. I just can't be a housewife or a stay at home mom. I tried being a housewife for three months, during my first year of marriage. I drove my husband crazy and he begged me to go do whatever makes me happy.
Am I a freak or are there other mummy's out there like me? Can you love your baby with all your heart and still want to go to work, leaving her behind everyday. Because if I'm honest, though I need to work for the financial comfort it gives me, I also want to work (even though my husband is willing to be the sole breadwinner).
There you go, the real, naive me laid bare. I published this on the 23rd of April this year, so it's probably too early to analyze if I've grown as a writer. I did realize one thing, I use 'Mom' and Mum' interchangeably, what does that say about me?
I want to let you in on a little secret, the first EVER post that I have written was not on this blog. It's a private blog but I'm going to share it with you. The entry doesn't even have a title, it's just an outpouring of thoughts. Depending on the response to this, I just may continue with that blog. So her's the entry I wrote on 18th November 2009:
Don't you sometimes wish, the world could be a little dreamily blurred around the edges. I know we have to live with reality and I'm fine with that but there are moments when you want all the realism to recede a bit. Dreams don't have to be unrealistic, just a nicer life option that you could be striving towards. Take my dream job for example; I would be running a book store cum cafe, where we would have a story-telling corner, book clubs, neighbours dropping in for their morning caffeine fix and yummy mummies coming in for their weekly meet-ups(maybe I'll add on a play area for toddlers!). The everyday steps of working towards this dream job are not so dreamy. For now hubby and I have quit our jobs and are working on our healthcare start-up. We've always wanted to run a socially responsible business and this is our chance. So before I embark on my cafe owning business, we first need to make a success of our start-up company. Luckily, I enjoy running this business way more than my previous 9 to 5 (or rather 9 to 9) job.
The modern day dreamer's refuge seems to be the neighbourhood coffee shop. Why? Though my home is my sanctuary,it's more so during the evening, when my daughter's in bed reading a bedtime story with her daddy, I'm sipping on a cup of Moroccon Mint with a chick-lit novel and the whole world is getting ready to slip into the world of dreams. During the day, it's more of to-do lists, interacting with the in-laws and rushing of to work - the practicalities of living. At a coffee shop, you have soothing music being piped in, a calmish atmosphere and time to just enjoy the moment with your favourite beverage. I rest my case.
*I have the girls at SITS to thank for this 'back to blogging post'. This challenge is sponsored by Standards of Excellence, Westar Kitchen and Bath, and Florida Builder Appliances.