Star for an Hour

Today was another first for our company and me. The first time we were on air. Yes, we were interviewed on a radio show! (The techie has already been interviewed innumerable number of times on t.v. He has even been on the news. However, we'll forget all that for now and bask in our two minutes of attention.)

We had loads of fun, and I actually forgot all about being a mommy, wife and all those other things. The doctor, who was with me, was also a mother of two struggling to maintain some sort of balance in her chaotic life. We both left the home front to our husbands and raced out the door to have a fun morning with an early-twenty-something RJ, who showered us with compliments. We even had a mini photo shoot at the end (thank God, I wore my new Zara formal shirt and black diesel jeans) and got a lovely goodie bag. I did learn that I had to pick-up a little more on the local language though.

My mom heard the whole show (you can always count on them to be your biggest supporter and critic), while my daughter and husband listened in right through the pre-school routine. My angel was delighted to hear her mommy on the music box (I like to think a little more than see her daddy on t.v).

The show was a breakfast one and after each segment they play a popular tune. Half an hour into the show, they played a current favorite of my daughter's. When they finished the song and switched back to the interview, apparently my little angel is reported to have said "Daddy can you call mummy and ask her to talk later, I really want to just listen to the music"! So much for my soothing voice being the center of her existence.

Obviously, the CFO part of me came back to the office to find a bunch of tax returns on my desk. So, I bid a sad adieu to my two minutes of fame and got back to number crunching.

The Little Things I Do For My Mommy

I hate being coped up in the house and my munchkin takes after me. So any free time we get together we grab our stuff and rush put the door. We do movies (we even do late night shows on the weekend), shopping, eating visiting the library, going crazy on the beach, you name it and we've done it. Given our current lifestyle most of this is just me and her time.

So it's a given that she accompanies me into public toilets. Like I've mentioned before, for all my dislike of staying home, I do love having my own loo. Unfortunately, I'm not rich enough to have one follow me around, and I have a relatively weak bladder, so I have to use the commonly available ones. I refuse to sit on the seat of a public toilet without using a liner (when available) or covering it with toilet paper and my daughter is well aware of this fact.

At home though I allow my bum to touch the bare toilet seat I always stock a few extra rolls of toilet on the bookshelf next to the toilet. This is in case the current roll runs out halfway through my requirement.

A couple of days back I was rushing into the washroom at home for a pee when my daughter decided to chat with me as I relieved myself. Her reasoning, "Mummy you tell me stories to help me poop, so I'll tell you a story to help you pee". Simple and difficult to refute. She noticed the empty toilet paper  holder and immediately picked up a fresh roll and replaced it. "Mummy some silly person forgot to keep you toilet paper ready". (No really! who in my train of maids could have possibly made that mistake?) Then she proceeded to tear of little squares of paper and lay them on the seat. I was in pain by then and politely asked her what in the world she was doing. "Mummy, I know you like a pretty seat so I'm decorating it for you to sit and pee".
 

Discovering Pure Joy

I'm not talking about some swanky perfume. Hello, I'm a mummy, we don't indulge ourselves with such wasteful pleasures, or rather we pretend not to and do it on the sly.

What's more important is, this weekend I re-discovered true joy. Don't you remember the blissed out feeling that  used to wash over us once we handed in our last exam paper of the term and had 60 days of summer fun ahead. I unexpectedly had that experience after years.

We were having a family wine session on Saturday night. There was some dance music on, the adults were chattering away and the kids were going crazy trying to keep up with the music and their made up moves. All of a sudden my mom (who does not touch alcohol) nudged me and pointed at my daughter. My little angel was dancing, not her usual bounce, but real dance steps. Crossing her feet, doing a gentle wave with her arms and best of all she had this totally blissed out expression on her face. I can't explain how or why, but for the next 15 minutes I was as oblivious to my surroundings as my baby girl. Her pure joy in dancing some how transferred it self to me and I entered this trance like state of total contentment and serenity.

If this sounds too New Age to any of you, don't worry, it feels the same to me. This is not me, I'm an overworked, highly-stressed, over-analysing individual, like most moms of my generation.

However, for those 15 minutes I was in a place I thought had disappeared with my childhood.

When I came out of my trance I nudged the techie and pointed at the munchkin, with the hope that he would get a glimpse into paradise.  

Peeing like a Big Person

I thought my little one was toilet trained and have been pretty free with her at home. Obviously, we have an agreement that she wear pull-ups when we are away from the home turf for more than an hour. She's fine with this since she hates public toilets and I'm paranoid about UTI (urinary tract infection) from using public toilets. Plus I have no intention of going diaper free at night till she's three and can get up in the middle of the night to pee. Apart from this she's toilet trained and hasn't even worn diapers to play-school for the past 6 months.

About two days back she did her usual "mummy pee" shout and I went rushing to get her to the potty on time. What I found, was her proudly hanging on to the proper toilet (with both hands) and standing in a puddle of pee. She gave me a big smile and said, "see mummy, I peed like a big person"!

Apparently, she saw my 6 year old nephew (I guess 6 looks big when you're two) peeing and thought she would prove herself in the same way. I obviously have a lot of explaining to do on 'how' and 'why' boy-girl peeing methods are different.

For the moment I just applauded and then explained to her that if we sit on the toilet we only have to wash our hands and not our whole body, so we save a lot of playtime. (Imagine, if she did the same in a public toilet! I wouldn't even know how to start cleaning those little hands.)

Any tips on how to tackle this? I definitely did not anticipate this stuff during parenting 101.

Should I Work with My Husband

The basis for today's post is an article I read in an entrepreneurial magazine titled "Should You Go Into Business with Your Spouse?" If you look at my previous entry on what working with my husband is like you'll see how this article hit the right note with me. The writer had quite a few relevant, noteworthy points. I decided to put my own spin on these points and share them with people who are thinking about partnering outside the house.

So try and answer these before you take the leap:

• Is this what you really want and is it right for you?: I think this is the most important question to answer, since a lot of people do things for different reasons even when their instinct is not to go ahead with something. A strong factor to consider is the nature of your relationship, is it a case of opposites attract, peas in a pod or something entirely different. This analysis will let you know what to expect in a working relationship.
• Why are you starting a business?: The reason you are getting into a business may change as you and the business grow over time. However, when starting you need to know if this is something you want to incorporate into your life for the foreseeable future or if you want to build a brand and sell it in the long run. 
• Who's vision is it?: Both partners need to be on the same page when it comes to how and in which direction you want your business to head. Have you both agreed on the nature of the business and the method of operation? Do you share a common vision for your future business? If this isn't out of the way right at the beginning (at least on an outline basis) it could cause a bit of strife.
• Are your expectations of work-life balance the same?: This is a potentially explosive area. It starts right from your concept of work ethics (can we check personal mail during working hours, can we work flexible hours) to who handles what responsibilities on the home front and how will you manage personal emergencies.
• Map out areas of management and responsibility: This point may seem simple, since it's self-explanatory. However, when you have people joining your business as employees they will need clarity on the reporting hierarchy.
• Can your relationship handle this arrangement?: The crucial question, obviously. Look at it this way, a lot of people have a baby to try and strengthen a relationship that may not be working. A new business s the same. Have a frank discussion on whether your relationship balance and status will withstand being combined with a working relationship.

Let me know what you make of this exercise. Was it useful? Do you have anything to add?

Next up:

• Part 3 - My personal answers to these questions
• Part 4 - Guidelines on establishing a working relationship with your spouse

 If you find this series too boring, let me know and I'll add an alert at the beginning of such posts.

Title of Substance

This was the third post I wrote on this blog. It was the first time I used a title that distilled the gist of what I was trying to convey (or at least I thought so). Most of my titles are pretty subject focused rather than substance focused (if that makes any sense). I hope I've piqued your interest enough to get you to read on.

"Wrong Shoes Mummy"


My mornings seem to be unbelievably busy, though all I do is feed my daughter breakfast and make her use the potty (my husband does this on my yoga mornings) before getting both of us ready. The rush is despite the fact that I organize all our clothes and other stuff the previous night.

I invariably lose my cool, when my daughter starts choosing what footwear she wants to wear to school. I mean she just turned 2 in April, isn't it too early for her to have a fashion sense? Anyway, this crazy morning rush was what caused one of my most uncomfortable days at work (since we started our own business).

It was a usual weekday morning and I had just about managed to get everyone in the car (we drop our daughter off at school on the way to work). The little one kept saying "Mummy, wrong shoes, wrong shoes". I shushed her with a "behave yourself" as I tried to feed her the cereal she had refused to eat at home. When we finally got to school she gave my husband a big hug and kiss before getting off. While I walked her to the gate, she had a last try "Mummy, your shoes are wrong" (she often gets mine and yours mixed-up). I ignored her comments and hugged her, she in turn gave me a kiss and a confused stare before heading indoors with her favorite teacher.

Half an hour later, I was holding my first discussion of the day in the corridor of our office, even before I reached my desk, when my accountant walked past and gave me a quizzical look. I smiled at her and continued the conversation. Throughout the day I kept getting these confused stares from people and couldn't figure them out. I finally found out why when I bent down to retrieve a fallen bill. Horror of horrors, I had worn my water-proof house-slippers, the variety with a red and black floral design to work!

While I was busy shushing her, my poor little baby was trying to save me from embarrassing myself at work. Now, I pay a lot more attention to her morning comments and try and stop myself from shushing her in general. I've realized one thing, she is totally focused on the moment, unlike her preoccupied mom.

I have a lot to learn from you my sweetheart.


Does the title suit the post? What title would you have used for this entry?


*Thank you to the SITS girls and their wonderful sponsors, sponsors, Standards of Excellence, Westar Kitchen and Bath, and Florida Builder Appliances for getting me out of a blogging slump with this challenge.

This is Special. Care to Share?

As the second challenge of the Back to Blogging exercise by the girls at SITS, we were asked to chose one post which we wish more people had read. Well, for me there was no hesitation here. This is my favorite post to date and one I really want to share with a lot more people. So here it is again.

Doing It All Over Again

Today's is my little brother's 26th birthday and I miss being with him. Even though I'm married with a baby, I can't believe my little brother is in his twenties, a successful trader who I see once in three to six months. I've always considered him my first child and still call him baby within our family circle (he would never live it down if I called him that in public).

We always were and are very close and both of us never imagined that we would live apart. In fact not very long ago, probably about 10 years back, we used to have animated discussions over what our shared grown-up flat would be like. We both share a love of books, and the only arguments we have ever had are over who would read the latest Wilbur Smith first, though we are very different in other aspects. My relationship with this baby of mine has been a defining constant throughout my life. First, I was his second mommy, then his friend and sister and now we are semi-equals (he still listens to me) taking and giving each other advice, support and love.

This unconditional love of a sibling is what I want for my daughter. This is the reason that, even though we can't afford another child now, financially or otherwise (in terms of time), I feel strongly that we need to have at least one more. The best gift my parents ever gave me was my brother and my child deserves the same sort of support and companionship. This in my mind has way more value than any other inheritance I can ever give her. Even after we are gone, she will have family to love her and for her to love, an unbreakable lifelong bond.

So though this entry has gotten a little mushy, I have come to a conclusion. However, tough it's going to be to go through the nursing, sleepless nights, potty-training and time management exercises again, I want to do it. This is truly the best gift I can give my baby girl.

Happy birthday my darling first baby, you are in my thoughts always. I heavenly you.


As you can see I wrote this post from the heart. Though this is true with a lot of bloggers, for me it goes two ways. I may feel strongly about something, however my writing style can also be objective rather than subject if the topic is not a personal one.


Anyway, back to the topic of my favorite post. What do you feel? Am I an exception in this generation or the norm.


*I'd like to thank the generous sponsors of this challenge,   Standards of Excellence,Westar, and Florida Builder Appliances.