The Nanny Hold-Up

Happy New Year. I love fresh starts and the possibilities they promise. One possibility I would love is a proper vacation at an exotic location with some serious pampering. Right now I'm strapped for cash and time, so am trying to make do with virtual vacationing via the net.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but if I had to choose who came with me on a holiday, this is how I would think:
- baby free holiday (yeah, I wish), then definitely the husband. I mean we haven't had our second honeymoon yet!
- holiday with the baby:
   1. hmmmmmmm.....I can take the nanny and spend the whole day at the spa or
   2. I can take the husband (who is a great dad and will definitely make sure I get some time off to relax) but we won't get any couple time, as he's totally devoted to V

I think my holiday dilemma gives people an idea of how attached I am to my nanny. Ok, not my nanny as an individual, but the nanny figure in my life. I totally need her to get through the day, at least 6 days a week. If she has an emergency and calls in the morning to say she can't make it, I completely lose it. That's because I basically have to spend the next hour or so organizing my little one's day and I have to take the second half of the day off from work or work from home with a little voice asking "Mummy if I play quietly will you finish working quickly and be with me?". Then the guilt kicks in and I can't focus.

Since our business is a  start-up, I spend about 10 hours at the office and work 4 hours at home (after the munchkin's bedtime). So in an ideal situation I have a morning nanny who picks V up from school and takes care of her till early evening after which a babysitter takes over till I get home for bath and bedtime.

All this being said and done, I'm currently nannyless and juggling working and babycare with the hubby. Thankfully our babysitter is available in the evenings for her regular shift. I think our desperate straits are common knowledge in the nanny world, along with the fact that we run our own business. Every nanny who comes to us for an interview is asking a salary that's double of what the market currently pays. And the perks! Although at this point I'm pretty open to anything expect the nanny getting into bed with the techie.

On second thoughts, if she finds him attractive would she do the night nappy duty in-exchange and let me have a night of full sleep! Worth thinking about.

New Year Aspirations

This has been a year of learning and growing for me. I like to think that I have blossomed as a person through the experiences I have had. The year centered around:

• starting a blog
• learning to be a mummy (I think this will be an ongoing aspect of my life as long as I live)
• struggling to get a start-up on it's feet while working with the techie (we have learnt to understand and accept each other a little better, I think)
• handling more responsibilities as a daughter to my parents and in-laws (and trying to support my grandparents a little better)
• just listening to my little brother as he goes through some big changes in his life (lots more to come in the new year) 

I began blogging primarily to get back on track with my writing. However, I've been overwhelmed by the amount of strength I'm been able to draw from the small but close-knit circle of friends that it has given me. As a bonus, it's brought me even closer to another mummy-friend of mine, who was little more than an acquaintance in school (Darling, you know who you are).

For the new year, I'm not going to make any resolutions. I'm only going to aspire to be happier and try not to dwell on the past or have any regrets. Hopefully, I'll spread around some of that happiness and joy.

I'm signing off now with a whole load of love and best wishes for my bloggy friends, who have given me so much this year. See you in 2011. Here's *raise imaginary glass of champagne* to more sharing, caring, happiness and fun in the coming year.

P.S.- This is my 49th post. So am starting the New Year with post no.50. Yay!

A Few of My Favourite Things

Here is what's brightening-up my winter days:

• Watching Sully (the techie) and Boo (my baby) enjoying Monsters Inc together. They scream and boo and giggle all through the movie
• My morning strawberry indulgence shower and my baby smelling of fresh honey and toffee after her morning bath 
• Brownie pie (at my local coffee shop) with my afternoon americano (isn't it great how all those winter layers let you indulge without worrying about the effect on your hips and tummy)
• The seasonal glitter and shine every where I turn. "I love my bling darlings"
• Getting to wear my favourite leather coat on my mini-break last week (I haven't used it for three years!) 
• Meeting my BFF (and her new-born son) after a 2.5 long years apart 
• Climbing back onto the blogging bandwagon after a series of longish breaks
• Catching-up on great books I missed, like the "Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" series. One book down, two to look forward too
• My baby singing "My Favourite Things" from "The Sound of Music" at the top of her voice, while being totally oblivious to who's listening. I wish I could enjoying being "me" as much as she enjoys being "V"

What's cheering you up this December?

Discovering Pure Joy

I'm not talking about some swanky perfume. Hello, I'm a mummy, we don't indulge ourselves with such wasteful pleasures, or rather we pretend not to and do it on the sly.

What's more important is, this weekend I re-discovered true joy. Don't you remember the blissed out feeling that  used to wash over us once we handed in our last exam paper of the term and had 60 days of summer fun ahead. I unexpectedly had that experience after years.

We were having a family wine session on Saturday night. There was some dance music on, the adults were chattering away and the kids were going crazy trying to keep up with the music and their made up moves. All of a sudden my mom (who does not touch alcohol) nudged me and pointed at my daughter. My little angel was dancing, not her usual bounce, but real dance steps. Crossing her feet, doing a gentle wave with her arms and best of all she had this totally blissed out expression on her face. I can't explain how or why, but for the next 15 minutes I was as oblivious to my surroundings as my baby girl. Her pure joy in dancing some how transferred it self to me and I entered this trance like state of total contentment and serenity.

If this sounds too New Age to any of you, don't worry, it feels the same to me. This is not me, I'm an overworked, highly-stressed, over-analysing individual, like most moms of my generation.

However, for those 15 minutes I was in a place I thought had disappeared with my childhood.

When I came out of my trance I nudged the techie and pointed at the munchkin, with the hope that he would get a glimpse into paradise.  

New Experience - Press Meet

Just wanted to share this with all of you. 

We had our first big press meet today. It was scary and exhilarating. Scary, since we have officially announced our name and  plans to the world and now have to deliver big time. Exhilarating, since all the work of the last one year is starting to taking shape. 

I will post more on this later. This entry was a quickie, just to share my 'high' with all you wonderfully supportive people. 

Stay tuned and keep rooting for us. I will definitely return the favour. 

5 years and more to look forward too

Tomorrow I celebrate 5 years of marital bliss (well mostly) with the love of my life. In these 5 years I've learnt a lot about love, life, maturity, mummyhood and being myself. Some of the lessons have been sweet, others a bit tough to swallow and a few have been bittersweet. But what all of them have  in common, is the lesson that every individual is continually growing and we need to give ourselves and our family the opportunity to enjoy the growth.

My husband and I are together on our anniversary after 3 years (yes, we have celebrated only one anniversary together since we got married), so this year is all the more special. I am lucky to have married the first boy I ever fell in love with and I'll never take that for granted. So today's entry is just to thank my husband for being who he is, the best husband ever, a loving son and son-in-law, a supportive brother and brother-in-law and a dedicated dad who dotes on his daughter.

Thank you honey, for:

• never judging me (When I wanted to enjoy a book and coffee, he learned to read quietly at coffee shops even though he wasn't really a book person and hated to eat alone)
• being my friend and mentor (He helped me write my first real resume and I'm always told by interviewers that it is extremely professional)
• letting me learn things at my own pace (When we were dependent on my cooking, he ate whatever I cooked or if I just didn't want to enter the kitchen he was happy cooking himself or ordering takeaway)
• always being on my side (I can't give enough examples of this one. He has always been my techie in shining armour.)
• always sharing the parenting responsibility equally (He could take care of the little one for a whole day and night before she was one. Giving her a bath, changing nappies, giving her the bottle, soothing nightmares, he did it all.)

My partner in life and love, without you my life would have a far poorer version of it's happy self.